The Ballad of G.I. Joe from Cha-Ching Pictures

• Scarlett - Julianne Moore
• Zartan - Billy Crudup
• Snowjob - Zach Galifianakis
• Baroness - Olivia Wilde
• Lady Jaye - Alexis Bledel
• Dr. Mindbender - Tony Hale
• Duke - Henry Rollins
• Gung-Ho - Chuck Liddell
• Shipwreck - Alan Tudyk
• Destro - Vinnie Jones
• Doc - Laz Alonso
• Sargent Slaughter as himself

This is pretty great but guys, seriously. We could do this.